IT’S difficult to keep up with the pontifications of nature enthusiast Chris Packham these days.

He seems to find everything annoying.

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In a recent rant, he had a go at Taylor Swift, saying that instead of using private jets on her tour, she should fly commercially.

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Chris Packham has recently been ranting about Taylor Swift using a private jet for her world tourCredit: Getty

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Nature enthusiast Mr Packham believes she should ditch her private plane and fly commerciallyCredit: Xposure

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The TV naturalist’s comments have simply proved he doesn’t understand the real worldCredit: Getty
What this proves is that Mr Packham simply doesn’t understand the real world.

Ms Swift’s tour is enormous. One day she was in Zurich, then she’d be off to Stockholm and London and Dublin and Paris and I’m sorry, but as anyone who’s used an aeroplane in the last few years knows, this sort of schedule would have been impossible if she’d used BA or Ryan­air or whatever.

She would either have been late for every gig, or not there at all, or in Copenhagen when she was supposed to be in Vancouver.

But there’s more to it than that. And this is something else Mr Packham can’t grasp.

Taylor Swift is so famous that going through an ordinary airport to catch an ordinary plane would be impossible.

If she stopped for every selfie-hunter, she’d miss the plane. And if she didn’t she’d be torn to shreds on social media for being rude and lah-di-dah.

So what Mr Packham is doing by kind of ordering her to fly with the masses is tantamount to bullying. Because she can’t.

Packham is reasonably well known among the nation’s ramblers and bingo enthusiasts, but he has no knowledge of what it’s like to be properly famous. So famous that you are physically mobbed by a braying hoard wherever you are in the world.

Remote villages in Africa. In the malls of the Middle East. On the streets of Rome. There is no escape, ever.

Taylor Swift brings Travis Kelce on Eras stage for first time as he takes over dancer’s role and fans ‘cannot breathe’
Fame has its advantages of course. Money and great restaurant tables.

Tire of the abuse

But when you’re properly famous, it’s a prison. A luxury prison for sure, but a prison nonetheless.

Look at Lewis Hamilton. When I first met him, shortly after the Battle of ­Trafalgar I think, he was a great kid.

Wide-eyed, polite and not afraid to wear his heart on his sleeve. I thought he was fab.

But then he got famous. Really famous. Not Packham famous. Clooney famous.

So now, he arrives at the race track every other weekend on a scooter so no one can stop him, and he’s wearing ear buds so he can pretend he can’t hear the fans’ demands for a selfie.

He’s even imprisoned when he’s in front of camera, having to make sure that he always seems reasonable and woke and grateful as he lives in the sustainable moment while supporting trans rights for hard-working families in the community.

Further down the fame ladder, you’ve got Max Verstappen who’s not in the same prison yet.

So he effs and blinds and refuses to apologise afterwards.

I met him for the first time recently and couldn’t believe what a straightforward, normal guy he is.

But it won’t last.

Soon, he’ll tire of the abuse he gets from the fans for effing and blinding and refusing to say sorry, and shortly after that he’ll realise it’s easier when you are in fame prison to ride a scooter and wear ear buds.

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Lewis Hamilton arrives at the race track on a scooter so no one can stop him, and he’s wearing ear buds so he can pretend he can’t hear the fans’ demands for a selfieCredit: AP
He’ll realise that, like Lewis and Taylor have, the only way to keep the fans happy is to avoid them.

I can’t imagine that Chris Packham will ever become a Formula One world champion but I know he likes music so I hope one day he releases an album that ­propels him to global superstardom.

I hope he gets all the riches of Araby and fawning adulation wherever he goes.

Because then we’d see how long it’d take him to ask his agent to book a G5.